eating fried rice. feeling a bit antsy.

i have been reading pages and pages of chaucer. and i am sooooo tired of it. (alison...don't you love chaucer? i'm sure if i went to canterbury i would appreciate it more).

but today has been such a long day. almost dreadful. i wouldn't say that it has been a bad day, but sometimes i get frustrated for no reason: especially when i forget to wear socks during wet weather.

another thing. don't ask me how, but i found myself at a site called "waitingforamissionary.com"

i about had a fit.

i think it was created with great intentions (i think the idea of it is nice) but the advice? some of it is absolutely horrifying and shallow. so i bid you to go visit it. let me give you a taste of what's included in the mess:


#1 this image explains everything. this, and others like it, are attached to varying topic headings. the headings seem informative and great! but then i click on "Get Advice" and i am bombarded with a woman in LINGERIE. i thought i stumbled upon the wrong site. yes, she is in fact seeking missionary-waiting advice, WITH a box of chocolates in red, fairly skimpy nightwear. tasteful? suitable? hm.


#2 we reach a section called "Get Cute!" which reminds me of a hannah montana song title...but also, reminds me of how we should NOT think before our missionaries come home.
i believe grooming and proper hygiene are important, but i believe that we should prepare ourselves in far less shallow ways. such as, spiritually, intellectually, and mentally (i guess that's separate from intellectually). believe me, i think that we should take care of ourselves, but i was a bit worried about paragraphs dedicated to making sure that EVERYTHING about your personal appearance is perfect for that first meeting with your missionary. analyze the following:

Ask yourself these questions:

"1. What do I like about the way I look right now? Is the way I currently look the image I want to project to the world?

2. Do I feel like I am in good shape or are there some things I would like to change? If so, what exactly?

3. Do I like to spend a lot of time on my appearance or only what is necessary or quick?

4. Are there any particular things I'd like to change? (Such as hair, skin, style.)

5. How much am I willing to spend money-wise and time-wise toward these changes?

6. Write down the experience you imagine to have the moment your missionary first sees you again. Be specific about how you are dressed, your hair color and cut, maybe even the way you are walking. This is what you're going to aspire to!!"

i am mostly in love with #6. i may start practicing my walk this very minute.



#3 okay. now that i have completely criticized the first bit of "Get Cute!" i want to pay attention to the list of stores we are recommended to shop at. you all know i like to poke fun at most of these, but the list is topped off with the perfect, most plump cherry!

here we go:

american eagle
hollister
aeropostale
abercrombie and fitch
(the list continues here for a couple more, fairly reliable stores but THEN...)

LANE BRYANT.

ladies and gentlemen. i am flocking to gateway this very moment to look like this for graydon: